Jeremy C. Shipp: If you were a mad scientist, what would your first creation be?

Jordan Krall: Build a Tom Atkins golem.

JCS: What can you tell us about your newest projects?

JK: Coming this summer is BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE APOCALYPSE DONKEYS which is probably the best thing I’ve done so far. Copeland Valley Press is publishing that one. Later this year, I have TENTACLE DEATH TRIP coming from Eraserhead Press. And also PENETRALIA from LegumeMan Books. Those three books are completely different from each other. They’re going to be wild.

JCS: Did the butler really do it?

JK: If you are referring to William Pauley III’s shit butler, then yes. He did it. It took him years to do so but success was finally achieved when Pauley was careless and left his fly open.

JCS: As an evil mastermind, how would you go about taking over the world?

JK: First, hire William Pauley III’s shit butler. Then, fly Matthew Revert to America and let him live in my parents’ basement. Next, I’d use my Tom Atkins golem to take over Silver Shamrock Novelties. After that, I’d use druid automatons to take over Dynatox Industries. Once I have my hands on all that toxic waste, I’d hold the environment hostage and force Ed Begley to pay me. But honestly I’d probably end up going bat-shit crazy and blow shit up.

JCS: Would you rather ride on a giant squid or a giant donkey?

JK: A donkey. Squid are frightening creatures and the oceanic abyss is even more so. Plus, giant donkeys read more than squid so at least I’d have something to talk about.

Jordan Krall writes horror, bizarro, and crime fiction. His work has been praised by Edward Lee, Tom Piccirilli, and Carlton Mellick III among others. Books by Jordan include Piecemeal June, Squid Pulp Blues, Fistful of Feet, and King Scratch. You can contact him at www.filmynoir.com.

Jeremy C. Shipp is the Bram Stoker Award-nominated author of Cursed, Vacation, and Sheep and Wolves. His online home is jeremycshipp.com, and his twitter handle is @JeremyCShipp.